Last year, my doctor/therapist told me how she felt I didn’t handle stress well. She said that I more of a listener than a talker. In other words, I at time internalize others problems/issues and don’t vent about what is bothering me to others.
When I shared this with a few close friends, they agreed with her. I found this so hard to believe. I feel like every time I open my mouth I am complaining about something. At least it is good to know that my friends don’t view me as Negative Nelly. However, I try to always have a solution to my problem. As that is a pet peeve of mine. I don’t like when others constantly bicker, nag, and complain and never even offer a resolution on how to overcome the problem.
What upsets me is when I hear how people, more specifically my friends don’t take me serious. And why not? The most recent statements have come from my wishes/wants of getting a roommate, wanting a new job, and desiring to move South. To me, none of these things are outrageous.
Nonetheless, as I reflect, I am now realizing that the doctor and my friends could be right. Subconsciously, this could be why I don’t share or vent my problems, as often. And who do I blame? The naysayers in my life. My naysayers aren’t necessarily negative in the sense that they knock down all my dreams and wishes. But they are passive pessimistic. They simply don’t believe anything I say. So why does this bother me so much?
Because it makes me feel I am a liar. Why else would you not believe me? It makes me feel like my close friends have no faith or belief in me. It makes me feel like while my friends are there to listen to me vent, they secretly think my resolution is ridiculous! (gasp)
So now that I have become armed with this revelation, where do I go from here? I have no idea. I don’t love these people any less, just wanted to vent…
